Slasher Studios Horror Webcast: Guilty Pleasure Horror Movies

Where Shopping Costs You an Arm AND a LEG!

On this week’s episode of Slasher Studios, our hosts Kevin Sommerfield and Steve Goltz will be joined with special co-host Dave Kaye as the three discuss their all time favorite guilty pleasure horror movies. Movies they should be ashamed they love but still love anyway. Show starts Monday September 3rd at 10PM central. Find out if your guilty pleasure makes the cut! Simply click on the link below to listen in live or to catch an archive of a previous show.

Slasher Studios Horror Webcast

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Tim’s Slasher Tweet Reviews: “Halloween: Resurrection” (2002)

About a month ago, we posted a scathing review of Halloween: Resurrection from one of our horror reviewers, Joshua Dean. He gave the film zero Teddys and declared it to be one of the worst horror movies he has ever seen and an insult to the entire franchise. Today our resident twitter reviewer Tim Schilling is going to share his take on film with a brand new tweet by tweet review. Let’s see if he has a similar reaction…

Thoughts before the film:
Last Halloween movie I own and then I get to move on to something else, hurry up! #HalloweenResurrection

Thoughts while watching:

0:04 That was the lamest way to have Michael survive the last movie. Such a cop out.
0:15 Such a terrible way to have Laurie finally get killed off.
0:29 Don’t act ever again Tyra.
0:40 I like how they abandoned the characters they created in the last movie.
0:41 What kind of set doesn’t have someone at the doors to keep people from walking in?
1:01 Did these people seriously think they were in a house that wasn’t rigged or anything?
1:05 I don’t understand, how hard is it to jump out a window?
1:19 Trick or treat mother fucker!
1:25 I am in complete shock that he was alive at the end! No way.

Final Verdict:
#HalloweenResurrection was a boring story that was probably written in a day. Kind of glad that they did a remake instead of another sequel.

To follow Tim on twitter: https://twitter.com/schillingt
To follow Slasher Studios on twitter: https://twitter.com/slasherstudios

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Tim’s Horror Tweet Reviews: “Deadly Species” (2002)

A few days again I mentioned how we felt deeply sorry for Tim Schilling. FOUR, count em FOUR, one Teddyhead movies in a row with no end in sight. Today we have a review from the last movie from the dreaded Walmart 8 pack from hell entitled Deadly Species. It can’t be as bad as the rest..can it?

Thoughts before the film:
Should I be like everyone else and watch Friday the 13th or something different? And that something different is called Deadly Species, the last movie on that 8 DVD pack I’ve been struggling to finish. Thank god this is the last movie in the 8 pack. I can’t handle anymore bad movies.

Thoughts while watching:
0:03 Someone who digs for fossils would not have painted fingernails. Just no.
0:10 I bet these people are making up words, what the heck is a colusfakada? I don’t even know what they’re saying.
0:15 But why is there a piece of grass going across the lens.
0:24 You’re kidding me right? You were tying your shoe, you were standing ON the bag and you didn’t see it!?
0:29 Haha the name of the generator was Generac… Good old greeking.
0:34 I wish I could find the gates to hell next time I went digging for fossils.
0:37 There aren’t enough tweets in the world to explain just how wrong this movie is.
0:39 Woo 40 minutes in and we finally see the monster creature alien thing!
0:55 It’s always a good idea to shoot into the dark when you can’t even see the target.
0:57 Oh what’s wrong, you’re bored of staring at the computer screen? Don’t talk to me about being bored.
0:58 This just turned into a really bad porno.
1:03 They said the name! I didn’t think the movie would be corny enough to do but it did.
1:09 I like puppets better than CGI, at least this looks corny in the good way.
1:19 Drinking some water stopped this guy from turning into a monster. A lot of thought was put through this.

Final Verdict:
I’m probably one of like 5 people to actually watch ‪#DeadlySpecies‬, and I know why. I don’t think I have to explain myself.

To follow Tim on twitter: https://twitter.com/schillingt
To follow Slasher Studios on twitter: https://twitter.com/slasherstudios

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Tim’s Slasher Tweet Reviews: “Junior” (2003)

Poor, poor Tim Schilling. Buying horror movie 8 packs from WalMart, you gotta admire his dedication in watching every single one of them. If that isn’t a true horror fan, I don’t know what is. Well, today we have another horror flick from the 8 pack of death. This one is titled “Junior”, will it break the bad movie curse?

Thoughts before the film:
I ain’t got nothin to do, so I’ll try to finish this terrible DVD 8 pack. Next up, ‪#Junior

Thoughts while watching:
0:02 Already regretting watching this.
0:10 I think I paid more for this DVD than what this film’s budget was.
0:15 I’m starting to feel as if this movie is more about their car than anything else.
0:21 Hehe I saw you cameramen shadows.
0:32 Every single one of these actors has an accent coming from who the hell knows where.
0:34 I think the car is the bad guy in this movie.
0:35 I sit down and do nothing when someone is banging on the top of my car too!
0:39 I’d love to see the script for this movie. “The car shakes as it growls at the bimbo”
0:40 Aw, too bad there’s an actual person doing the killings. I was really hoping it was the car.
0:43 “It’s barbecue time, you fuck!”
0:55 (said the name)
1:15 This guy keeps on calling an old lady a slut…
1:19 This guy is so mean to his son, too bad the acting is terrible cause otherwise I’d actually feel bad.
1:25 I’ll just pretend to be your mom, and then light you on fire (again) when you’re not looking.
1:29 Oh please don’t let there be a sequel.

Final Verdict:
If ‪#Junior‬ had a better crew behind it, I think it coulda been a decent movie. The story was good, but I don’t think it was carried out well

To follow Tim on twitter: https://twitter.com/schillingt
To follow Slasher Studios on twitter: https://twitter.com/slasherstudios

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Tim’s Slasher Tweet Reviews: “Bloody Murder 2” (2003)

Yesterday our resident Twitter reviewer Tim Schilling took a look at the awful would be “Friday the 13th” clone “Bloody Murder.” Today he is back with an all new tweet by tweet review for the sequel, cleverly titled “Bloody Murder 2.” Is it as bad as the original or is there hope for this would be franchise after all?

Thoughts before the film:
What am I getting myself into…At least people say this is better than the first. Please be true.

Thoughts while watching:
0:06 They said the name. I look for this in every movie now…
0:07 Wait, so is the girl the same from the first one? I can’t even tell.
0:12 He was counting for 20 seconds… And they made it seem like he was there for 20 minutes waiting for them to hide.
0:13 This movie is exactly the same as the first one so far. What the heck.
0:17 There’s actually blood in this one!
0:25 Death count by arrows in this movie: like, all of them?
0:34 Stop crying, it’s your fault you’re a skank.
0:39 The only good thing about this movie so far is this guy’s catchy ringtone that has gone off about 20 times now.
0:52 I bet they’re gonna try to make it obvious who the killer is again, and then switch it into someone completely random.
0:59 Oh god here’s when it turns into a detective movie just like the first one.
1:11 I told you they would make the killer seem to be someone, and then change it to be someone completely random.

Final Verdict:
The production of ‪#BloodyMurder2‬ was better than the first, but that still didn’t make it a good movie. Boring story, annoying characters. Thank god there isn’t a third entry in this series.

To follow Tim on twitter: https://twitter.com/schillingt
To follow Slasher Studios on twitter: https://twitter.com/slasherstudios

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Tim’s Slasher Tweet Reviews: “Bloody Murder” (2000)

In 2000, a movie was released that was the end all be all “Friday the 13th” rip off. Too bad the movie in question was about fifteen years too late to capitalize on that franchise’s huge success. The movie was titled “Bloody Murder” and it was ripped apart by horror fans and critics alike with many calling it the single worse horror movie of the decade. While I personality didn’t feel it was THAT bad (did these critics in question watch “Ax Em”?), it certainly wasn’t good by any stretch of the imagination. Today we have our faithful twitter reviewer Tim Schilling ready to take a look at the film to ask the question, “Is Bloody Murder really THAT awful?”

Thoughts before the film:
Finishing up this pretty bad 8 pack from Walmart I got months ago. I’ve been avoiding this… ‪#BloodyMurder‬

Thoughts while watching:
0:02 Chainsaw has been done before.
0:04 I wonder if it’s a law in the writing world to called everyone names Julia, jewels.
0:13 They said the name! I didn’t think they would in this movie.
0:17 They faked being the killer two times already, I’m not gonna believe it’s the killer next time now.
0:25 Lemme just push you off the boat, watch you drown for a little bit then bring you back up.
0:27 I don’t know what movie these people are watching in this, but I’d rather watch that than this one. Make sense?
0:31 Ohhh your watch beeps on the hour… Please let me have your technology.
0:32 Is this a detective movie? Sherlock Holmes right here.
0:39 How did this movie not get sued by the people of Friday the 13th? This is exactly the same.
0:45 Really? A character’s name is Jason? There’s a difference between homages and blatant copying.
0:58 How can someone “seem really tired” if they’re already sleeping?
1:02 Falling on your butt = scratched up knee.
1:05 …oh I’ve seen this movie before. I remember turning it off before I finish it, wonder why.
1:10 No, it was not drew. The guy in the mask was way bigger and taller than her.
1:12 It took like 5 murders for the cops to finally close down the camp.
1:17 This makes absolutely no sense. Like at all. Did a 5 year old write this?
1:24 I bet the guy walking away is the killer in the sequel.
1:25 Wait never mind he’s dead.

To follow Tim on twitter: https://twitter.com/schillingt
To follow Slasher Studios on twitter: https://twitter.com/slasherstudios

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Wax? Paris Hilton? What’s the Difference? “House of Wax” Review

In 1974, a woman is making a wax head in the kitchen while her son eats cereal in his highchair. Her husband enters carrying a young boy who is shouting and kicking. The boy is forced into a highchair and strapped in place by his father. After being strapped and taped to his chair by his mother, he scratches her hand. She then slaps her child across the face.

In 2005, Carly (Elisha Cuthbert) and her boyfriend Wade (Jared Padalecki) with her friend Paige (Paris Hilton) and Paige’s boyfriend Blake (Robert Ri’chard) are on their way to a highly anticipated football game in Louisiana. Eventually, Carly’s delinquent twin brother, Nick (Chad Michael Murray) and his friend Dalton (Jon Abrahams) also join them. Night falls and the group decides to set up camp for the night. The campsite is later visited by a stranger in a pickup truck who shines his lights at the campsite, but refuses to leave or address them until Nick smashes a headlight with a bottle. The next morning, Carly and Paige go exploring, Carly falls down a cliff and lands in deer remains and sees a fake hand. Wade’s car’s fan belt is found to be damaged. The group meets a disheveled, rural man named Lester (Damon Herriman), who offers to drive Carly and Wade to the nearby town of Ambrose to get a new fan belt, while the rest of them go to the football game.

The two arrive at Ambrose, which is virtually a ghost town. Unable to find an attendant at the auto mechanics shop, they wander into the church, disrupting a funeral. There, they meet a mechanic named Bo (Brian Van Holt), who offers to sell them a fan belt after the funeral. While waiting for the services to end, Carly and Wade visit the wax museum, which itself is made of wax and is the central feature of the town. Afterward, they follow Bo to his house to find a proper fan belt. While there, Wade is crippled and stabbed by a long-haired man with a wax facemask named Vincent. Bo grabs Carly, super glues her lips shut and locks her in a cellar. Dalton and Nick arrive in Ambrose to look for Carly and Wade. Vincent meanwhile strips and shaves Wade, then puts him in a chair with a metal contraption on his head which pins his eyes open. Vincent pulls a couple of levers which showers the immobile Wade with hot wax.

Can Wade escape? Will Paris die? Are any of them safe? Oh please…House of Wax isn’t really big on plot. It’s got your normal set-up that deals with extremely attractive boys and girls ending up in a bad situation. Some live, some die. If you’ve seen a horror film in the last 30 years, you know how it goes. The movie is slow going and a bit choppy at the beginning but still with it. Even after watching countless horror films over the last few years, I’ve gotta admit that I’ve become jaded and can smell things coming a mile away.

So the production team decided to go with that idea and jack it up a notch and tell the audience, OK, you know what’s going to happen next, but we’re going to make it ugly so you’ll jump out of your seat. And casting Paris Hilton was a stroke of genius because for the first time that I can recall a hot female character that people still wanted to see die. And, she did a nice striptease down to her underwear before the bad stuff happened to her. When things get bad, it gets really bad in a hurry. In fact, all the death sequences were quite horrible to watch, yet I couldn’t help but feel that the horror movie geek inside of me was very, very satisfied.

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“Final Destination 3”: Dead on Arrival

When Wendy Christensen has a vision of an accident on the roller coaster, resulting in her and her friends’ deaths, she instantly begins to panic, causing more of her friends to be left of the ride. The remaining friends, including Wendy’s boyfriend, are stuck on the roller coaster and find themselves involved in the accident. With death waiting around the corner, Wendy and Kevin Fischer must try and work out death’s plan, before they and the remaining survivors end up dead. Ahh, gotta love the Final Destination movies. As stupid as some of the stories sound, they manage to get the job done in bloody, inventive ways. Final Destination 3 opens with said rollercoaster accident in what may be the best opening act for a horror movie since, well, Final Destination 2’s freeway accident.

The acting is bad, the story borderline, but it doesn’t really matter. The deaths (nail gun, tanning bed, cherry picker) are ingenious in their design and that ending is one of the better ones of the series. Nonetheless, in all honesty, this is probably my least favorite of the franchise. The characters are pretty annoying and movie feels strangely padded. After the wonderful “Final Destination 2”, this feels a bit like a let down. That being sad, there is enough carnage candy to go around for those who love their bodies extra bloody. This isn’t high art by any means but it gets the job done.

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Just Hang Up: “When a Stranger Calls” (2005) Review

On one side of town, a babysitter and the kids she is watching are brutally murdered. The police are disgusted as it is implied that the murderer used his bare hands to rip them to shreds. The film then changes to teenager Jill Johnson (Camilla Belle). She is going through average teenage crises, having her boyfriend, Bobby (Brian Geraghty), cheat on her with her best friend Tiffany (Katie Cassidy), and going over 800 minutes on her cell phone, for which her dad, Ben (Clark Gregg), is making her babysit for a rich family to pay the debt. This causes her to miss a school bonfire, which her friend, Scarlett (Tessa Thompson), is attending. She arrives at the exquisite and elaborate Mandrakis House, perched upon a lake with a maid and a greenhouse built in the center.

The parents (Derek de Lint and Kate Jennings Grant) show her around and tell her their numbers, stating that they won’t be back until midnight. The kids are upstairs asleep and it should be an easy night for Jill. Jill begins the night by snooping and trying on Mrs. Mandrakis’ jewelry, in other words, being a bitchy teenage brat. She then starts receiving anonymous phone calls; she first dismisses them. The calls soon to be too much and poor Jill is threatened with her life. Will she make it out of the night alive?

Once in a great while I will watch a movie that completely surprises me. One that comes out of nowhere to be a bit of rousing entertainment. One that is pure fun from beginning to end. Well folks, “When A Stranger Calls” is NOT that movie. It is an unbelievably stupid and far fetched remake of the much better 1979 horror camp classic. Our lead heroine Jill is forced to babysit after going over her cell phone minutes and is harassed by telephone calls from a mysterious caller. Every cliche in the world is used here from the stupid cat-jumping-out-of-a-hidden-spot to the car that won’t start. This movie is bad…not even bad in a “so bad it’s good way” more in a “so bad it’s boring way.” Skip this godawful film and save your movie for something else. You’ll thank me later, trust me on this.

Buy it here…if you dare: When a Stranger Calls

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